Sunday, March 26, 2006

A Right Load of R's


Saturday March 18th Championship at Ninian Park
(a ground we don't have to share with anyone)

CARDIFF CITY (0) 0
QUEENS PARK RANGERS (0) 0

Crowd:
14,996

QPR:
350

Weather:
Mini monsoon pre-game, light drizzle during game

Atmosphere:
Loads of kids but, thankfully, no horns.

CARDIFF CITY and QPR plodded their way through 90 minutes of 0-0 football-hell. City maintained their season long affliction of Bighomecrowd-itis but at least they didn't lose this one. Both sides, through bad defending rather than good play, had one golden opportunity and wasted it. A combo of poor conditions, poorer play and a game devoid of quality and imagination meant both sides comfortably cancelled the other.

It was a game that truly belonged to a dustbin. On a day when spluttering Preston also drew at home, Wolves had a shock home defeat and teams below us lost, it did no harm but little good. Games and chances to make the play-offs are fast running out, we certainly therefore lost two points than gained one.

Family Fun Day was the theme - someone forgot to tell the weatherman and the footballers - every paying adult could have upto 2 free kids. I bet Gary Glitter was gutted to be inside and unable to go. The crowd responded - Friday "in the know" informers declared it was already over 16,000 - but turned out to be 14,271 officially. All sections of the ground looked busy with, pleasingly, the Family Stand packed. City also put next term's season ticket sales on offer and had very early takers.

Attendance may also have hit the last minute walk up crowd. After a beautiful sunny mild start to day, the skies turned grey and by lunchtime, it poured and poured. The Bob Bank terrace, unsurprisingly, was the one area of the ground with room. With the football on offer, a planned Fun Day for the kids was anything but for many. Miserable weather, miserable football, welcome to life with Cardiff City! Seriously, with floods in Sloper Road and huge puddles to tip-toe through or around outside the turnstiles and queues like a Next sale for ticket kiosks, catering booths and the like, it emphasised why our stadium - great as it is to traditionalists - still belongs to the last century.

With everyone fit, Dave Jones gave any thought to his starting eleven, it would have been for a few seconds only before deciding on the same eleven who started - and Jerome in injury time apart - finished too and won at Plymouth. It was therefore Alexander, Ardley-Purse-Loovens-Barker, Koumas-Ledley-Scimeca-Cooper- Jerome-Thompson. Subs were the same too with Worgan-Boland-Cox-Nsungu-Weston. Boland was called to the bench in place of Jeff Whitley who does appear to be falling out of contention.

Rangers came to Ninian Park comfortably settled in mid-table, 15 points above the relegation sides and 10 points behind City. To the outside world, Ian Holloway was likeable, humorous and doing a reasonable job. To those that follow QPR, the joke had worn a little thin and the brand of football was poor.

In came coah and ex-player hero Gary Waddock and they seem happier. Results have picked up, the point extended their unbeaten run to 5 games which started with a superb 3-2 win at Sheffield United but it's been four successive draws since - two x 0-0 and two x 1-1.

In goals and getting a good reception was veteran Wales stopper Paul Jones. Defence were Bignot-Evatt-Shittu-Milanese. Midfield were Ainsworth-Bircham-Lomas-Cook and forwards were Youssaf and Nygaard. Nygaard, a 6' 3" Danish international forward was a handful and scored the winner in Rangers 1-0 victory over City at Loftus Road last Xmas in an equally poor match, his strike partner was also Danish - Youssef having his first start with Kevin Gallen suspended.

In Steve Lomas and Marc Bircham, they certainly had a competitive midfield accompanied by Gareth Ainsworth, returning only a week after playing in Leggy's benefit match, had a great reception and was last off the pitch after waving to all sections of the ground and doing the ayatollah. On the bench was Richard Langley who got a hot welcome with boos every time he warmed up and chants of a derogatory style. He was never a hero but endeared himself less to City fans with claims of being spat on at Loftus Road. Nobody was aware of that and it would have been some feat from where City fans were housed.

And so the match highlights. For once, I'm going to be brief and keep it brief, it really doesn't deserve much more attention and scrutiny. Word is obviously out to set yourself up with tow banks of four when visiting NP Towers and City have little answer, Rangers simple plan exposed the limitations of our side. The pitch was greasy after the heavy rain and both sides spent the entire first half launching long balls forward hoping it would set one of their strikers clear, they could hold it up or a defensive error would be made. It was dreadful to watch.

Darren Purse was awarded man of the match in a game and style of football that was perfect for him. Yes, yet again, either our goalkeeper or a central defender is our best player, in a home game as well. I lost count of how many headers Pursey won but he also got in some big tackles. Some of his flicked headers back or sideways under pressure were sublime but a couple of times, he totally misguided headers too but luckily found Neil Alexander.

First half chances were at a premium, the closest City came was when Steve Thompson, easily City's best midfield or forward performer, missed connecting with Jerome's low skidding ball across the face of goal by a toenail. He also narrowly missed connecting with a header, Ledley - after good set up work by Ardley and Thompson - found the side netting with a low drive and Cooper had a couple of swings from distance, Koumas found the side netting as well after one sweeping move. City did produce a couple of moments of play and passing quality but all too often, it lacked in the final third.

City's only anxious moment, a couple fo stray Purse headers aside, was one penalty area scramble where the ball pinged around before Youssef tried an overhead kick but lacked any power. One threatened break through Ainsworth was abruptly ended by a calculated Loovens foul for the game's sole yellow card but quite a bit was seen of an over fussy ref who loved the sound of his whistle. He blew for too many innocuous moments and, annoyingly, multi-blew his whistle every time too. It just added to the frustrations.

Half-time: CITY 0 QPR 0

In line with the Family Fun Day, we had a kid's game - better than the real match - some kids dribbling around cones and a girl recovering from a serious illness. The kids in the ground however were in the 200 yard queue for hot dogs.

So to the second half and, to be honest, more of the same except QPR had the early chances. Ainsworth was just wide and then got Alexander to produce the game's first save of any description after 55 minutes when he did very well to push a free-kick around the post for a corner.

City were struggling to find any cohesion and fluency. Jason Koumas was showing magic in his touches and control but, all too frequently, it was in an area of the pitch where he could produce little harm. It summed up his game that his only free-kick chance, a very difficult one, was miskicked into the wall.

Then there were those two wasted chances from defensive mistakes. Cameron Jerome first. The player is struggling. He may be closing in on 20 goals but it's only 2 in his last 9 games. Today he looked lazy at many times, his control let him down and, as at Plymouth, he completely wasted a golden opening. A ball from the left was missed by Shittu and ran to Jerome 12 yards out and in the clear. He waited and hesitated and waited giving Paul Jones all the time to run out, by the time Jerome shot, Jones was in enough distance to close down and beat away his shot. The Jerome we know would have buried it comprehensively.

QPR's miss was just as bad, if not worse. Chris Barker somehow miskicked across goal and found Nygaard completely in the open. He had all the goal to aim at but hit it too close to Alexander who got a touch on the ball which deflected it to the inside of the post, across the face of goal and then behind for an unproductive corner.

After that made spell, it was game over. The final 25 minutes as poor as anything we had watched all afternoon. City's defence were doing fine and had ridden an uncomfortable spell but midfield was poor and disjointed. Riccy Scimeca slightly out of things, Joe Ledley invisible apart from a few moments, Kevin Cooper well out of it and Koumas trying hard but unable to produce magic in the telling areas. The forwards found themselves isolated but were also guilty of not holding up the ball well enough to involve the midfielders more. The number of offsides awarded against Jerome was bewildering and rounded off a poor performance and unhappy afternoon for him. Thompson worked hard but without reward, he was the only one who came close to rivalling Purse.

Dave Jones brought on Rhys Weston for Cooper and pushed Ardley forward late on, his one opportunity to cross saw him send the ball into the Canton Stand. It was disappointing to see Nsungu not given a chance and just as disappointing to see Ferretti not even included. He may be raw but does offer something different, home games are now must win, the squad may be limited but are we using all options?

Dave Jones and Cardiff City's problem and challenge remains very simple. Many feel we've reached our limit and probably over-performed to be where we are. Only once this season have City enjoyed an unbeaten run of more than three matches - it was 6 months ago. Only twice this season have they had a winning run - even then, it lasted two games only and has only happened twice all season.

With just 6 games to go and quite a tough finishing programmes, unless City can, at least, replicate one of those runs - they probably need both - there is just no chance of making those play-offs. If runs like these as good as we can be, then we quite really don't deserve to be there anyway, do we? Good Luck boys.


The Cost of Being A City Fan: (Cost are for two .. again)
Tickets: £26
Programme: £ 3
Club shop goodies: £15
Food/Drink: £18:
Transport: £ 4
Total for game: £66

Total for Season to date: £2,888

Some Sequels Are Worth Trying

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

LEGGY'S NIGHT
A good night enjoyed by Leggy and a far better than expected crowd. The official attendance wasn't announced but with Upper and Lower Grandstand full and the Family Stand around half full, I thought that amounted to more than the "over 5,500" quoted on the tannoy.

This was a benefit game for Andy Legg who has been good for the game and the game has been good to him. Playing until almost 40 with 7 permanent clubs behind him, his best time in football and his most iconic status was achieved with City.

Here for 5 years starting with bad times — relegation to the dungeon - and the best of times culminating with his final City appearance in that Championship-making play-off final win over QPR. Recent successful battles with cancer saw him awarded this benefit game with a
donation going to local charity, Latch.

Pre-game ticket sales were poor but nobody buys an advance ticket for a benefit game. Car parking was free and it was full but with The Echo as reliable as ever informing us we could pay at the turnstiles, we arrived to find several queues 100 yards+ long to get to the various ticket portakabins snaking out into Sloper Road and onto the road. Kick-off had to be delayed by 15 minutes to 8pm. Only at City, I tell you. The second-half was cut-short by the same time as we'd all seen enough by then and there was a party at Giovanni's for the players.. Only at City, I tell you.

Inside, the bars and catering kiosks were closed. The club missed out there. Thankfully, nobody chanted "we want beer" and started smashing on the shutters although I had a brief go.

Little point in reporting the game but those with a thirst to know, there were about 40-50 players used.

The only members of City's squad who didn't take to the park were Neil Ardley, Jason Koumas, Paul Parry, Martyn Margetson, Nicky Fish, Jon Kift, Anthony Taylor and the on-loan Danny Parslow and Byron Anthony but also appearing were youth players Scott Allison, Curtis McDonald, Jamal Easter, Joe Jacobson and also physio Sean Connolly.

Legg's X1 had a few missing, a couple of guests (most notably Robbie Savage but also Big Neville Southall, Ray Houghton and Dave Watson). Managed by Alan Cork "I've never had a bad game managing at this club, have I?", Those who did play included Gareth Ainsworth, Dave Bennett, Jason Bowen, Carl Dale, Earnie, Jeff Eckhardt, Mike Ford, Leo Fortune-West, Jason Fowler, Jimmy Gilligan, Cohen Griffith, Steve Jenkins, Graham Kavanagh, Lee Kendall (as an outfield player), Kevin Ratcliffe, Christian Roberts, Damon Searle, Peter Thorne, Mark Walton, Gareth Whalley and Scott Young. I may miss have missed a few more.

The first-half hour, Leggy's team were determined to put on a show. Neil Alexander had to save from Kav, Earnie was trying but it was generally a knockabout, none too serious. Once that was once and a whole raft of substitutions took place, the game turned in the current City side's favour. NSUNGU scored, ironically by turning Leggy inside out before beating Big Nev from close range. Leo made Neil Alexander save by sending a header where he meant it to go - how unusual?

The second half with mostly "retired" rather than current players for Leggy's team and younger players for City became a little more one-sided. Goals were added by Phil Mulryne (a free-kick), Jamal Easter and a very sharp-looking Andrea Ferretti. I'd love to see Ferretti given a chance before the season concludes. In between Easter's and Ferretti's goals, roly-poly ref Keith Cooper awarded a penalty to Leggy's team just to give them a shot just after Leggy went off, Carl Dale sent a good effort past Allison.

There were more than a few laughs. On the pitch, Neil Alexander dribbling around Earnie was entertaining. Some of the antics were too. Bigger laughs came from pitchside interviews conducted with several ex-players and Robbie Savage. Most of Legg's players wore different shirt numbers to those on the list which had Ali announce many of them incorrectly but it was all part of the fun. Good of Ali to play "I fought the law and the law won" for City fans who went to Wolves.

I can't get enthused about these games although I'm always there. A decent night for those who went, a great night for Leggy.

The Cost of Being A City Fan:
Ticket: £10
Prog: £ 2
Car Park: Free
Travel: £ 3

Total for game: £15

Total for season-to-date: £2,712

Sunday, March 05, 2006

JOE THE MAGNIFICENT



Manchester Evening News Arena, March 5th 2006

One venue, one date but one occasion I will never forget as I was felt pleased, proud and privileged to watch one of the greatest sporting nights of my life.

When I escape Cardiff City or Wales, boxing is the other love of my sporting life. I love being there at any big Welsh fight. Over the years, I've been there for Colin Jones, Robbie Regan, Steve Robinson, Nicky Piper and, latterly, the mighty Joe Calzaghe. They've all been successful to varying degrees and they've all represented Wales directly or indirectly - these are my heroes.

Joe Calzaghe has been the ultimate. Forty professional fights, won every time, only visited the canvass once (and the guy who did that was made to regret it) but he's been the best, by miles, in an era just after the best of British (Been, Eubank, Collins etc) retired leaving a void. What's been out there feted as the World's Best - Roy Jones Junior, Vivian Harris, Bernard Hopkins - have all avoided Joe and, such it boxing politics and management, have fought much lesser fighters. All have come unstuck in the past year, are now well past their prime and in serious decline.

Joe has fought and beaten everyone out there. This was his 18th defence and he's well into his 9th year as a World Champion. Both incredible records but none as incredible as the fact that Joe has never had the respect and adulation that he thoroughly deserves.

Why? As mentioned, the opponents haven't been there. Sky tv meant his fights were only seen by a select audience. Injury problems, specifically to the hand, meant some of his victories have been ordinary. A boxing legend is amongst us and we've never appreciated it ... until now.

Joe finally got his career-defining fight. Jeff "Left Hook" Lacy was touted as America's best new thing. His record was fantastic, 21 wins (17 by k.o.) and nowhere near a defeat. He had the look, he had the arrogance, America believed he was the new Mike Tyson. So convinced were they, they agreed to fight Calzaghe in Britain.

Their man was 6/4 on, Joe 11/10. Just about everyone I knew told me Joe would lose. I was the only one who said 'no way' and pointed out that the better the opponent, the bigger Joe's performance. All his big name opponents - Eubank, Omar Sheika, Richie Woodhall, Mario Veit (twice), Charles Brewer and Byron Mitchell - were each comprehensively demolished. There was no logic or justice in the arguments that Joe would lose, just people buying the hype. Faith was limited - you crazy fools!

With Millennium Stadium unavailable, hi-ho, hi-ho, it's off to Manchester we go ... having to leave City v Sheff Weds 10 minutes early but, hey, the way they were playing, it was perhaps a blessing!















Manchester M.E.N. Arena
A Modern Collisseum

I loved the Manchester Evening News Arena. Build directly on top on Piccadilly Station in the centre with some great bars and restaurants outside, it was ideal. It was bloody freezing too with hail and snow pouring on us in a mini-blizzard.

Inside, what a great venue. Holds 20,000 and it's like a mini-Millennium Stadium. Great views wherever you were. The worst seats perhaps 80 yard up and 80 yards away from the ring.

Outside, the concourse was buzzing. Bars everywhere, the boys were happy. SuperChef Gordon Ramsey was happy to be seen there too until he got chaired and mobbed. That was the point he sh*t himself and had to be rescued by police. The Jacks were there in force, many calling in on their way home from a game at Barnsley but got so hammered in the bars, half ot them didn't even realise their man Enzo Maccarinelli was fighting inside. He won, put his man down but it went the distance on a night he had to scrap it out and not really convince following his strong start.

Back inside with an Arena probably not two thirds full, we were asked to swap - at no cost - our £50 seats for £150 ones near ringside. Looks better on telly. I bit his hand off ... well I had top, I hadn't eaten since lunchtime!

Up went a chant of "You Scouse Bastards" from the local Mancs as Steven Gerrard, Peter Crouch, a couple more Liverpool players and Jamie Redknapp walked past me. They expected it but didn't like it. Amongst the crowd, up went a roar of "Gerrard is a Bluebird, Gerrard is a Bluebird" and "Gerrard for Wales" from yours truly. Stevie G didn't expect that but certainly liked it, I got a huge smile off him. If we lose Phil Mulryne this summer, perhaps Gerrard will come encouraged by my chanting for him in a hostile atmosphere. I can only dream!

And so SHOWTIME and a fight you've all seen, heard about or read about and maybe still can't get enough of.



Champion! Champion ... for the 18th time.


What was it like being there? Monumental and emotional, a night when I sang, shouted, screamed, stamped and cheered Joe non-stop from first bell to last - along with everyone else there - and got rewarded by a boxing performance that I've never seen bettered over 12 rounds by any boxer in a fight of this magnitude.

Lacy was out-jabbed at the start of the first round, battered at the end of it. The writing was already on the wall and it only got worse for him, better for Joe who was unrelenting in his work-rate, pressure and attacks. I can only salute Lacy for taking it.

Make no mistake, Lacy was out-muscled, out-boxed, bullied, he lost the boxing contest, he lost the in-fighting, he was out-powered in the punches, he was treated with contempt by Joe's power, skills, hand speed and movement. Not just in one round but every single round.

Each Joe punch was cheered wildly and ecstatically, every attack was accompanied by a clack as 12,000 seats upturned with the crowd rising as one, every round ended with cheering knowing Joe had comfortably won the three minutes and Lacy heading back in the general direction of his corner with the whole audience bellowing "easy, easy, easy, easy".




Lacy hides behind a post and a cameraman.

Calzaghe still finds and pastes him!


Many of the Welsh crowd presented and there were plenty everywhere you looked were singing Bread of Heaven. It's normally against my principles to join in with that one but not tonight on this occasion it wasn't.

By halfway, Lacy had two cut eyes, a busted noise, he was bleeding from his mouth. He was able to muster some forward movement and a couple of punches in each round for a small period of time but, without exception, his reward for that was another battering in return. Hit Joe and he always got it back times ten. At one point 40 punches rained on Lacy in 15 seconds according to tv, nearly all of them hitting the head.

Fears subsided Lacy had the power to put Calzaghe away, even though he had a puncher's chance. Only Joe being complacent and sloppy could cost him, he never once was. Indeed, when he only had to stay out of trouble to win, his attacks became even more intensive. On tv, Lacy was heard to ask at the end of Round 8 which round he was in, he was clueless.

Joe's only disappointment was being penalised a point in Round 11 for a punch around the back. He made up for that by smashing Lacy all around the ring. In the final round, with the whole arena throbbing and bouncing, Lacy was finally floored but still got to the finish. I doubt Joe will be disappointed he didn't knock him out, to have dismantled the man comprehensively and won every round with every judge will be his boxing legacy.





Joe and Frank Warren with post-fight interview


No matter what happens from now on, Joe's place is boxing history is assured. I don't think it is possible for him ever to top a performance like that, I was just so pleased to have been a very small part of it by being there. Simply Fantastic.






Lacy - high profile arrival, low profile departure

Oh it's all gone quiet over there

Once the interviews were over, Joe danced around the ring, came over to the Welsh hordes and celebrated with us for a few moments. Lacy was sneaking away with us shouting out to him, "where's your belt gone, where's your belt gone".

I don't think his imminent prolonged headache from a comprehensive battering was going to be a problem - it will pale into insignificance when he tries to get out of Manchester Airport with a passport photo that will bear no resemblance to his current look!

It took 45 minutes walk at 4am to get across Manchester to the station, another hour before we get book to our hotels and bed and we didn't stop singing, smiling or talking about it all the way. Who cared if was minus three and precarious with frozen ice everywhere?















Job done, Joe enjoys banter with his Welsh disciples!

No, not me. I was there the night Joe Calzaghe became a boxing and Welsh legend. Thanks for giving me a night I will take to my grave Joe and talk about until I get there. You were magnificent. Nothing more to be said.










Thursday, March 02, 2006

NOT OVER THE MOON or SICK AS A PARAGUAY

WALES 0 PARAGUAY 0 Friendly


The Arctic Monkeys is not the latest vogue group, it's the kids with horns who go to watch Wales on a freezing night like last night. At least they were there.

Just 12,324 went. Mind you, that's still a fair few more than Cardiff City can muster these days! It included 60 or so Paraguayans with one chant, a double whistle by chief cheerleader followed by Par-a-guay. The South Americans, surely mostly exiles, must have enjoyed the bracing South Wales weather. The roof was shut, it didn't help.

The crowd were 90% made to occupy one side of the stadium, no surprise to learn that was the side opposite the tv cameras. I think the crowd was about right, it was the venue that was wrong - this should have been taken to Swansea or Wrexham but I won't complain about another chance to watch my country and, of course, there was always the opportunity to buy a cheap seat and walk into a best one if you were daring enough - many of us were!

Other advantages - car parking near the ground was easy, getting to the front of a bar and served even easier. You could even get a seat in pubs around the ground. The novelty of it all!

As for the game, it was an international friendly. Like testimonials, pre-season games and FAW Premier Cup games, there is no answer to the question, "when have you ever seen a good one?".

For Wales however, with the serious business of Euro'2008 qualifiers starting early next season and John Hartson finally retiring from the international scene after two years worth of performances in the red shirt that made many think he already had, this was a time to test young blood and those who can perhaps serve us over the next few years.

With that in mind, it was a shock to see 39 year old Paul Jones in goals. However it was just as well because he turned out to be the Welsh hero making 4 or 5 superb stops before finally being replaced by Lewis Price for the final quarter, the rookie keeper also making one fantastic stop.

The Paraguayans, as with all Latin American nations, were nimble and skilful. Their first World Cup 2006 match is against England and, on this limited evidence, they can certainly give them a good game. I look forward to supporting them!

They do look loose at the back however and their shooting, despite the saves was quite poor. Both need to be sharpened if they're going to do anything more than make up the numbers.

For Wales, Ginge and Gabbs didn't control and look as assured as they can be in a 3-5-2 system. The one who caught the eye was Lewin Nyatanga (a great taffy name) who with just 13 league games for Derby and at just 17 and a half became the youngest ever Welsh international, taking that title from Ryan Green. I only hope he goes onto achieve far more than that player.

He certainly showed the talent. A good left foot, tidy composure, he looked more than comfortable at this level. Nyatanga even managed to get up front but put a header wide. He could not have hoped for a better debut. Well done son.

In the system, Jason Koumas didn't stand out as much as his golden daps. I can only hope he was saving himself for Saturday. With some irony, Wales won their only dangerous free-kick of the night after he went off, Ginge scooped that one over. Midfield overall were functional and methodical, Simon Davies being the pick for me until he limped off.

Strikers for the night, and likely the immediate future, were Ryan Giggs and Craig Bellamy. With no target man, the style is very much to hit them early, even hit them long, hit them in their direction and let's see what they can conjure. On the night, it wasn't a great deal.

Bellamy took the friendly exercise spirit far too literally and jogged through the game in a half-hearted manner. He had four or five outstanding chances, in a competitive game, you would have backed him to have scored at least one or two of them. Instead, the Paraguayan keeper didn't really have a save to make ... unless you count Bellamy's attempted lob when clear on goal with all the time in the world, that he scooped into his arms instead.

Giggs took on too much responsibility, was over-elaborate and often tried to do it by himself. He never came off for him, it was never likely to. However, in a match situation, there's little doubt those two can cause a lot of problems. It may even be we are better away from home than at home.

A poor spectacle became even more disjointed in the second half with both sides using their rotas of 5 subs but at what seemed like 2 minute intervals. More youngsters for Wales and the crowd were particularly happy to see Earnie and Joe Ledley come on. Joe looked good, he has the attributes to be a long-serving Welsh international. Earnie's lost weight but hasn't increased his danger just yet. In fact, all I noticed him do twice was spin himself dizzy on the touchline trying to twist and turn past players and taking the ball out instead.

Biggest groan of the night came with the over-enthusiatic tannoy man (did he really bleat on about a fantastic and memorable night at final whistle?) excitedly announced that we had three minutes of added time. We didn't want it mate!

Overall with players like Cotterill and Crofts also getting involved, it can only have been a useful night for the national team. Whether it was a useful night for spectators and the tv audience is entirely another matter.
WALES NEW KIT
- A "SHORT" POINT















What's bigger?
The shirt or shorts???

Why is it everyone is talking about the new shirts but nobody is talking about the new shorts???

The "retro" shirt with an enormous white band "v" neck looked good to me. If it's true that Kappa have finally, after all these years, realised that the average Welsh fan doesn't have a 30" waist and the design of a model in a biology book, then it bodes well. Adults will love it and would buy that in preference to a TOFFS retro shirt. Kids, however, will not be so fussed. Many around me last night thought it was horrible. They'll come around!

However what was it with those shorts ... or should they be called longs? I think they've tried to create a 1950's knickerbocker look to go with the shirt but they are the best comedy shorts I've seen in ages. On our smaller players i.e. most of the team, they look like three quarter trousers .... they'll be full length on me then! Several players gave no flashes of leg to the girls as they socks went higher than the bottom of their shorts. Brilliant!

Maybe we should go the whole hog and get Sky to show us in Pathe news style black and white clips. Richard Sheppard can do the commentary, he always sounded like he belongs to that era.